Clarence
hello again blogoshpere! it hasn't actually been that long, but feels like forever. I'm sure nobody noticed, but I suppose that's my problem.
so I'd like to tell you all about a new friend of mine. his name is Clarence and he is currently curled up on my desk (actually half falling off it) wrapped in his leash, sleeping in blissful and peaceful repose. (he's so cute when he's sleeping!)
Clarence is my new pet potatoe. a good friend had promised me one, and made good on his promise several weeks ago. His full name is Clarence Fritzgerald II. The first Clarence Fritzgerald was my good friend's former pet duck.
I know what you're thinking;
"But potatoes grow eyes!"
"but potatoes go mushy!"
"but you EAT potatoes!"
"don't keep him in the dark too long!" etc.
oh I have heard it all before, but I do not care. I reuse to listen to the cold hard cynicism of all you cold hard cynics. No one is eating Clarence - when he expires, he will be respectfully interred in the ground, probably alongside Phillip. I trim his eyes when they start to grow. and the fact that he likes to escape from his leash on occasion is perfectly normal in any adolescent potatoe. he is a happy fellow;he likes to frolic and whistle and things of that nature. he gets nervous when people pet him on the wrong end. really, he's just like all his peers. excpt for the leash. and the fact that he's not being eaten.
he has gotten pale lately.probably normal in a healthy, hardworking potatoe. at least I don't have to worry about skin cnacer with this one.
that's about all that's new with me lately, except for the fact that G-d decided to give us a little taste of the Flood this weekend; something wrong with the pipe in our shower and everything got wet. makes for good conversation at least.
(potatoes are no good when everything is drowning.)
so I'd like to tell you all about a new friend of mine. his name is Clarence and he is currently curled up on my desk (actually half falling off it) wrapped in his leash, sleeping in blissful and peaceful repose. (he's so cute when he's sleeping!)
Clarence is my new pet potatoe. a good friend had promised me one, and made good on his promise several weeks ago. His full name is Clarence Fritzgerald II. The first Clarence Fritzgerald was my good friend's former pet duck.
I know what you're thinking;
"But potatoes grow eyes!"
"but potatoes go mushy!"
"but you EAT potatoes!"
"don't keep him in the dark too long!" etc.
oh I have heard it all before, but I do not care. I reuse to listen to the cold hard cynicism of all you cold hard cynics. No one is eating Clarence - when he expires, he will be respectfully interred in the ground, probably alongside Phillip. I trim his eyes when they start to grow. and the fact that he likes to escape from his leash on occasion is perfectly normal in any adolescent potatoe. he is a happy fellow;he likes to frolic and whistle and things of that nature. he gets nervous when people pet him on the wrong end. really, he's just like all his peers. excpt for the leash. and the fact that he's not being eaten.
he has gotten pale lately.probably normal in a healthy, hardworking potatoe. at least I don't have to worry about skin cnacer with this one.
that's about all that's new with me lately, except for the fact that G-d decided to give us a little taste of the Flood this weekend; something wrong with the pipe in our shower and everything got wet. makes for good conversation at least.
(potatoes are no good when everything is drowning.)
6 Comments:
maybe clarence wouldn't feel the need 2 escape his leash if he had a companion? perhaps a sensible, rotted idaho potato?
i meant rooted. sorry. i enjoyed ur blog.
seriously, you're still not Danforth Quayle.
But potatoes grow eyes!"
"but potatoes go mushy!"
"but you EAT potatoes!"
"don't keep him in the dark too long!" etc
I love it when you mention me on your blog...
Someday, my friend, he will rot and die. And you will be the only one who mourns him. The others will just be annoyed at the smell.
you and your potato are very weird. speaking of weird....guess who has a shidduch date tonight??!!!!!
Richard- Dan Quayl had a pet potatoe?
Tobie-first of all, Avy will mourn him too. secondly, so what? no one needs to mourn Clarence but his loved ones. WHEN that time does come.
Q-what??when?? who?? e-mail me details STAT woman!
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